brokenness. ballin’ friends. birthdays.

1. my neighbor taught breanna and i to make puerto rican rice. i made it on monday night, and it was actually good. this neighbor that i speak of, she’s great. she has four beautiful children, cooks like none other and is so crazy generous and hospitable to us. she opens her door to us any time and makes us feel at home. she gives us leftovers. she takes time to teach us to cook.

2. for curriculum we are reading The Way of the Heart, by Henri Nouwen. it is SO good. read it. it’s about solitude, silence, and prayer. we actually have a solitude retreat next weekend – where we are pretty much in solitude thursday night and friday. i have to admit, silence scares me sometimes. maybe i’m scared of all of the thoughts? but through that sweet communion with God in the silence, healing comes. i’ve seen that. and that’s what i desire: intimate communion with God. ALSO – read Life of the Beloved by him.  it’s BALLIN.

just a quote to spark your interest.

“the compassionate person is so aware of the suffering of others that it is not even possible for him or her to dwell on their own sins.”

3. my roommate, daniel, gave me one tiny dread on monday.

4. my team made s’mores on tuesday night. it was kjartan’s first time ever trying them. we melted the marshmallows over our gas stove. it was great.

5. on my birthday, i woke up, walked to the bathroom, opened the door – and it’s filled (so filled i can barely get in) with balloons and stuff written on the windows. my teammates and the interns at urban promise (the after school program we work with) did this for me. it was amazing. the kids at the afterschool program made me feel so special, too. one little boy brought me a bracelet – his dad said he ran home the day before and said dad! i have to get lindsay something for her birthday! his aunt suggested earrings, but he said he didn’t see me wear earrings, so a bracelet would be better. this kid is in kindergarten! and another one of the girls in 6th grade brought me a cake. it was amazing. and all of the letters and packages i received from home. i was so completely humbled.

6. there is too much else to write. but here are thoughts i’ve been writing all week.

i love the 5th grader i sit with at the bus stop in the mornings as we wait for our buses. i love hearing a neighbor say, “don’t worry, i’ve got your back.” i love drinking coffee out of a mug with chewbacca’s face on it. i love worshipping Jesus in ways i never have before. i love and hate learning things about myself i wasn’t aware of. seeing that living in community is like “seeing yourself naked.” i love when scripture comes alive like never before. i love having only one mirror, which is in the bathroom you share with 4 other people. i love laughing with my team. i love playing foosball, and on the rare occasion,winning. i get angry at injustice, like when i hear that in my neighborhood, sometimes the trash doesn’t get picked up, or if a bags breaks, they leave it there. that wouldn’t happen on the other side of town. hearing that the education the kids in my neighborhood are getting is not good – like an “A” here is like a “C” other places – for some reason it’s okay for standards not to be as high. i love when a teacher at the child care center tells me about her life as a single mom, and got my number so we could hang out. or when an assistant teacher saw me at the bus stop and said she could pick me up in the mornings to go to the child care center.

and a final thought. God loves with a GREAT love. He loves us abundantly. He gives ABUNDANT life. FULL LIFE. i think i’ve settled for mediocrity a lot in my life. i don’t want to do that any longer.

“and once your were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked…

BUT GOD, being rich in mercy, because of the GREAT LOVE with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us ALIVE with Christ – by grace you have been saved – and raised us up with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the IMMEASURABLE riches of his grace in kindness towards us in Christ Jesus.”

Ephesians. 2:4-7

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